Friday, February 20, 2015

Minus 12 degrees actual

Yes, this is us this morning...which equates to about -20 windchill.  I lay in the bed listening for the normal sounds of morning and hearing very few.  What actually awoke me was a stream of emergency vehicles careening down Lake Road, siren and lights blaring, reverberating around our bedroom.  At first I thought it might be coming to our house and I worried (cuz I am such a great worrier).  But they sped past and then...............SILENCE.  Truly an eerie silence.  Not often heard on Lake Road. Then these words came from my brain.

-12 degrees actual

Silence!  It is so silent outside
Occasionally a car goes by,
slower than usual
And not nearly as many.

It's as if the air is fragile--
So fragile that everything knows
That any movement or noise 
Will cause it to shatter.

I am so NOT a poet altho Lin is always encouraging her readers to give it a try.  But this morning, this is what came out of lying in bed and just listening.

Perhaps this is the message I need for myself...to just lie or sit and LISTEN.  

Christmas 2013 M2T2 gave both Robert and me a memory book, small and fat. Each date had a question we were to answer.  I just finished mine last week...I think it took so long because of all the memories and emotions those questions stirred in me. It took so long because sometimes I would have to sit and listen to my heart and head remind me of details, some of which I could write down...others just had to be relived.   After a bit, I realized I should have typed up the Q/As for myself, or for the other kids. It is a powerful bit of family history.  I didn't because I wanted M2T2 to have this book to share with their kids before moving to San Francisco...so they will be able to always connect the book/memories to their Granny in Ohio...not just read from afar.

Sunday an amazing friend returned a book to me with this sticky attached to the cover.  I've scanned it because Linda Bruderer has a distinctive handwriting style I want to remember.


And she told me this was meant specifically for Marissa's move.  And very true each time I have to say good bye to all my kids.

Back to the chill...it is so cold, breaking records as far south as Ohio's Lower Peninsula (as Jordan has just called Florida).  Up here we are fortunate.  Our bodies get us ready gradually for the temperature changes...either cold/freezing or hot/sweltering.  But our poor New Hatch Batch have no time to adjust.  

Jordan bought Hillary this as a surprise gift:
 OH-IO will always be in their hearts and home.
They added the wood pegs to represent where they were both from and where they began their own eternal family.  I think despite the fact they live in a sort of wonderland in Florida, their hearts will always belong in Ohio.  I miss them...terribly.  As I miss all my kids, and will especially miss Marissa and her family.  Having them so close, eating every Sunday together was such a blessing.  Having them buy a home gave me the false sense that they'd be here forever even tho I knew that was not going to be true.  

It needs to be that lying/sitting and listening is what will get me through whatever separations may come..and oh how happy I would be if any of my kids move any bit closer to us.  Nah..not going to happen but I often live in a fairy tale world.

1 comment:

Lin Floyd said...

now you are excuses to visit the west...could you scan your little book and make a life story for your other families? they would all love it!

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