Thursday, June 06, 2013

Reminder to self

After a discussion with one of my piano students' mom, I decided to blog this as a reminder to myself.

For the last while, I have been amazed, hurt, and surprised at how many times people have talked over and through me, while I've been talking.  As wonderful as Robert is, he does this to me quite often and I am guessing it's just done without thought.  Sunday night, as we were leaving a home where Robert had to lead the 2nd of 2 discussions on service, I was answering the home owner's question which entailed a story.  Robert comes up and says, "I left my suit coat inside," and of course the man turned quickly and went to get it.  I remarked to Robert, 'You've done it again."  He replies, "I'm sorry.  You have to train me better."  Really? I thought...after 41 years of marriage and several years before?  But I just figured it is what it is, even my kids have done it to me.  Thinking moreso that I must be boring and let it go (well, sort of let it go).

(Found this supreme shot of an amazing interruption:  Taylor had just won an award and this famous jerk gets up to praise one of the losers.  Really?!

THEN on Tuesday I was at Apples, staring at the glazed croissants telling myself I didn't need one and I didn't..when up comes this sweet old lady, at least 80.  She too was looking to buy a donut for her very sick husband and we struck up a conversation about all sorts of things.  I think she just needed to talk.  At some point, I was answering a comment she made and she started to talk through and over me.  Then suddenly she stopped and said, "I'm so sorry!  I interrupted you.  Go back to what you were telling me."

It was then that I realized that this Problem really had nothing to do with me. I'm not boring.  I'm not a L...O...N...G-winded story teller. This has to do with society and the lack of courtesy in humans.  Again I wonder where manners and etiquette has disappeared and how can we bring it back.  Like the mom this morning, we have worked hard to ask questions and to become good listeners but sometimes it's good to be heard as well.

The next mom I spoke with today talked about how people today think nothing about being late.
 Her son was to have his Eagle Scout review and the head of council (at least I think he's the head) was 30 minutes late.  So many of the younger scouts don't wear the uniform nor have their patches sewn on. The late father's son had his stapled on and was late for his own review and advancement.  Together we wondered why we seem to be amongst the last of the dying breed who listen to others and who are early, not late to things.  Who know how to properly dress for whatever occasion.

As to the lateness issue?  I remarked that when telling the parable of the 10 Virgins, it's always centered on 5 not being prepared, not having their testimonies and how they were not able to borrow such an item.  My view goes beyond that.  Those 5 not only were not prepared, they thought they could arrive LATE for the wedding feast and be allowed in.  Imagine their surprise when they were denied entry.  Personally, I wish we could deny entry to all the late comers.  Some things just aren't acceptable.  Late being one.  Rudeness being another.  Improper attire another.  Liars...oh wait...I don't want to make a list so I'll stop.  By this time when I come back to read and remember, I'll know what to add to this's always been in my head.


Dawn Barrett said...

yes...I was super annoyed to be walked over repeatedly last night at the band concert by people who had to walk in and out...repeatedly. One was late...left early. Some think that they need to take texts from their boss. (Not at 7pm...not for an hour. Or take it outside.)

Lin Floyd said...

it's sad and it's hard not to take it personally-what gets me is grandkids not thanking you for things you did or presents....

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